What Is a MIAM?
A MIAM — Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting — is a preliminary meeting with a qualified family mediator. It is not mediation itself. Think of it as an information session where you learn what mediation involves, whether your case is suitable, and what alternatives exist.
The MIAM was introduced by the Children and Families Act 2014 as part of a wider push to keep family disputes out of court where possible. The idea is simple: before you can ask a judge to decide your parenting or financial arrangements, you must first explore whether you and the other parent can reach an agreement through mediation.
This requirement applies to most applications for:
- Child Arrangements Orders (where the child lives, spends time, or has contact)
- Specific Issue Orders and Prohibited Steps Orders
- Financial Remedy Orders (financial settlements following divorce or dissolution)
🐦 Key Point
Attending a MIAM is a legal requirement — not a suggestion. If you apply to court without either attending a MIAM or qualifying for an exemption, your application will be rejected. The court checks this via Form FM1, which must be signed by an authorised mediator (or by you, if exempt).
When Is a MIAM Required?
You must attend a MIAM before making an application to the family court for most private law children or financial matters. The requirement applies whether you are the applicant (the parent starting the case) or, in some circumstances, the respondent who wants to make a cross-application.
There are a few situations where the MIAM requirement does not apply automatically:
- Applications for an emergency protection order or other urgent protective orders
- Applications made within existing proceedings (e.g., varying an existing order)
- Cases where a MIAM has been attended within the last 4 months
- Cases where the applicant is a local authority (public law proceedings)
MIAM Exemptions: When You Can Skip the MIAM
The law recognises that mediation is not appropriate in every case. Rule 3.8 of the Family Procedure Rules 2010 sets out specific exemptions. If any of these apply, you can complete the exemption section of Form FM1 yourself without attending a MIAM:
1. Domestic Abuse
You are exempt if there is evidence that you or a relevant child have been the victim of domestic abuse by the other party. Evidence must be from within the last 24 months and can include a police caution, conviction, protective injunction (non-molestation or occupation order), letter from a domestic abuse support service, or a MARAC referral.
2. Child Protection Concerns
If there are ongoing child protection concerns — for example, the local authority has issued care proceedings or there is a child protection plan in place — you may be exempt.
3. Urgency
Where there is a genuine risk of immediate harm to a person or child, or a risk of child abduction, the court can accept an application without a MIAM. This must be genuine urgency, not simply impatience with the process.
4. Other Party Cannot Be Contacted
If you have made reasonable efforts to contact the other party and cannot locate them, the mediator will confirm this on Form FM1 and you are exempt.
5. Previous MIAM or Mediation Breakdown
If you attended a MIAM within the last 4 months and the mediator confirmed mediation was not suitable, you are exempt from attending another. Similarly, if mediation has already been attempted and broken down, a new MIAM is not required.
6. Bankruptcy or Insolvency Proceedings
Applications relating to bankruptcy or certain insolvency matters do not require a MIAM.
Important: Evidence for Exemptions
If you are claiming an exemption, you must have the evidence to back it up — especially for domestic abuse. The court can and does check. Making a false claim about an exemption is serious and can damage your credibility in the proceedings.
MIAM Costs: What to Expect (2026)
MIAM costs vary by location, mediator, and whether you qualify for legal aid. Here is a typical breakdown:
| Type | Typical Cost (per person) | Notes |
|---|---|---|
| Private MIAM | £80 – £150 | Most common. Paid directly to the mediator. |
| Joint MIAM | £120 – £200 (combined) | Both parties attend together. Only suitable in amicable situations. |
| Legal Aid MIAM | Free to eligible party | If you qualify for legal aid, your MIAM is free. The other party's first joint mediation session is also covered. |
| Subsequent Mediation Sessions | £100 – £250 per session | If you proceed to full mediation after the MIAM. |
Many mediators offer a free initial phone call to discuss your situation before you book the MIAM. This is worth taking advantage of — it helps you understand what to expect and gives you a sense of whether the mediator is a good fit.
What Happens in a MIAM?
The MIAM is typically a one-on-one meeting with the mediator lasting around 45 to 60 minutes. It is confidential. Here is what the meeting covers:
- The mediator explains mediation. How it works, the mediator's neutral role, the voluntary nature of the process, and what happens if agreement is reached or not reached.
- You explain your situation. The mediator will ask about your family, the children, the issues in dispute, and any concerns you have — including safety concerns. This is your opportunity to be heard in a confidential setting.
- Safeguarding assessment. The mediator will ask about domestic abuse, intimidation, or any imbalance that might make mediation unsuitable. This is standard; do not be alarmed by it.
- Options and alternatives. The mediator explains alternatives to mediation, including collaborative law, arbitration, solicitor negotiation, and court proceedings.
- Next steps. If mediation is suitable and you wish to proceed, the mediator invites the other parent to their own MIAM. If both parties agree, joint mediation sessions follow.
At the end of the meeting, the mediator can sign your Form FM1 confirming you have attended the MIAM. If mediation is assessed as unsuitable (for example, due to safety concerns or an unwilling other party), the mediator will still sign the form — and you are then free to apply to court.
How to Prepare for Your MIAM
Preparing well makes the meeting more productive. Here is what to do:
- Clarify the issues. Write down the main disputes — living arrangements, contact, holidays, relocation, finances. Be clear about what needs resolving.
- Gather relevant documents. Any existing court orders, correspondence from solicitors, school or medical letters, and your proposed schedule. If you use a co-parenting app, have your communication records and calendar to hand.
- Prepare a parenting plan outline. Even a rough idea of what arrangements you think would work shows the mediator you are solution-focused.
- Think about the children. What are their routines, needs, and preferences? The mediator will want to hear about them.
- Manage your expectations. The MIAM is not a negotiation. Nothing will be decided in this meeting. It is an information and assessment session.
- Write down your questions. It is easy to forget what you wanted to ask. A short list ensures you cover everything.
🐦 What Records to Bring
Organised records are helpful for a productive MIAM. Bring a summary of key dates (separation, previous orders, changes in arrangements), a note of any concerns about the other parent (with examples), and records of your involvement in the children's lives — school, health, and day-to-day activities. Apps like Larkling that provide structured co-parenting records can make this much easier by keeping everything in one place.
Form FM1: What It Is and How to Complete It
Form FM1 (Family Mediation Information and Assessment Form) is the official document that proves to the court you have complied with the MIAM requirement. It has three parts:
- Part 1: Your details — name, address, the application you intend to make.
- Part 2: Mediator's section — completed and signed by the mediator after your MIAM, confirming attendance and outcome.
- Part 3: Exemption section — completed by you if you are claiming an exemption from attending a MIAM. You must specify which exemption you are relying on.
Form FM1 must be filed with your main application (C100 for child arrangements, Form A for financial remedy). It is filed alongside — not instead of — the application. The court will not issue your application without it (unless you have validly claimed an exemption).
You can download Form FM1 from the GOV.UK website.
How to Find a Family Mediator
Finding a qualified mediator is the first practical step. Look for mediators accredited by the Family Mediation Council (FMC) — this is the professional standards body. FMC-accredited mediators have completed rigorous training and adhere to a code of practice.
Where to search:
- Family Mediation Council register: Find a mediator search tool
- National Family Mediation (NFM): A network of not-for-profit mediation services across England and Wales
- Resolution: The family lawyers' organisation — many members are also mediators
- Local law firms: Many family law solicitors have in-house mediators or can recommend one
- Legal Aid Agency: If you may be eligible for legal aid, search the LAA mediator directory for providers who hold a legal aid contract
When choosing a mediator, consider their location (you will need to attend in person, though some now offer remote MIAMs by video call), their experience with cases like yours, and whether they offer legal aid if applicable. Most mediators are happy to have a brief, no-obligation phone call before you book.
What Happens After the MIAM?
If mediation is suitable and both parties agree:
- The mediator invites the other parent to their own MIAM
- Once both MIAMs are completed, joint mediation sessions begin — typically 1–2 hours each
- The average case takes 3 to 5 joint sessions to reach agreement
- Any agreements are recorded in a Memorandum of Understanding (not legally binding) and/or an Open Financial Summary for financial cases
- You can take the memorandum to a solicitor to draft a consent order for the court to approve (making it legally binding)
If mediation is not suitable or the other party refuses:
- The mediator signs your FM1 confirming you attended
- You are free to apply to court
- You may still benefit from having clarified your own position and gathered information during the MIAM
Mediation vs Going to Court
Mediation is not mandatory — attending a MIAM is, but actually mediating is not. However, mediation has significant advantages over court:
- Faster: Mediation can conclude in weeks; court proceedings often take 6–12 months or longer
- Cheaper: Even at £100–£250 per session, mediation costs a fraction of contested court proceedings (which can run to tens of thousands)
- Less adversarial: Mediation focuses on finding solutions, not assigning blame
- More sustainable: Agreements reached voluntarily are more likely to be followed than orders imposed by a judge
- Better for children: Mediation reduces the emotional toll of litigation on children by keeping conflict lower
Mediation is not appropriate in cases of domestic abuse, significant power imbalance, or where one party is unwilling to negotiate in good faith. The MIAM exists precisely to identify these cases and route them to court where necessary.